Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Let's stir up the pot shall we?

      Why not start 2013 with a controversial topic? An uncomfortable one for most people for a multitude of reasons. Some people, because they struggle with it and feel shame, others because they are judgmental towards those who do struggle with it and heap condemnation onto them. Consider this as your warning to stop reading if you are going to be uncomfortable with the topic and would rather not be a part of the conversation. But again, as with my 12% post, I will be tactful, gracious, and honoring to God in the way I approach this delicate subject. Ready?

Pornography.

     WHAT?! GASP!

     Here we go. Let me first define what I mean when I am talking about Pornography. I mean the act of going on the Internet/watching a movie/looking at a magazine that is sexually explicit for the purpose of sexual gratification (read: masturbation). I know, these terms seem so brutal because the Church does an excellent job of NEVER talking about it and either pretending it doesn't exist or waiting until a person is caught or confesses to deal with it. And that's what I want to talk about.

     If you are a parent reading this, I hate to break it to you, but your child has already been exposed to porn. Studies have shown that by the age of 11, most children have already seen it either at home or at someone a friend's house. That is unbelievably heartbreaking. Here are some statistics you can take a look at for yourself if you are wondering about the secular studies done in the past few years. Porn Statistics

   I've read a number of books, both secular and Christian, about the effects of pornography on our culture, what it means for our teenagers, and what it means to the Church. I started to look into the subject when I was in college and I started to find out that there were a LOT of people who "struggled with porn." (That is to say that they are addicted to porn. Just like an addiction to alcohol or drugs, they can't stay away from it. But we say "struggled" instead of "addicted" for some reason...maybe that's our first problem? Hmm...) I didn't understand how something like pornography could be such a draw for these people who were otherwise amazing Christians, until I started understanding that there really is an addictive quality to the actual behavior. I've read a number of articles outlining the neurological processes involved and how your brain can truly become almost numbed.

   But here's the real issue (and I'm now going to talk to you...yes you. The person reading this blog post who is struggling with porn. I know you keep finding yourself back in the same place over and over again, so I want you to listen very closely okay? It's going to get brutal, but it's going to get better. Deep breath.): dependence on porn is spitting in the face of God. There are so many levels of the behavior that breaks God's heart. He loves you so much and to watch you destroy your innocence the way you have has caused Him so much pain. "Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies." (1 Cor. 6: 18-20) You are meant for so much more than the temporary pleasures that porn can provide for you. Don't you see that God has designed you with passions and desires for something better than to be spent in front of a computer?
It is God’s will that you should be sanctified [Set Apart]: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister. The Lord will punish all those who commit such sins, as we told you and warned you before. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, anyone who rejects this instruction does not reject a human being but God, the very God who gives you his Holy Spirit. (1 Thess 4: 3-8)
     You are worth waiting for. Let me say that again. YOU ARE WORTH WAITING FOR. I know you don't believe it, and I know it's easier to give into the desires you have now, but someday, you will have a husband/wife and I will tell you that this addiction won't go away once you are married...just like a drug addicts doesn't go away and an alcoholic's addiction doesn't, your addiction will still be a part of you. And then you will be hurting more than yourself, more than your God who loves you and died for you...you will be hurting your spouse. And pornography is never enough. It changes your behavior and attitude toward sex. Sex is something beautiful that God designed. We are created to have these passions and desires, but to pervert them with our lust and greed is something that YOU have to choose to stop in your own life.

I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman. -Job 31:1

Do not lust in your heart after her beauty
    or let her captivate you with her eyes.
For a prostitute can be had for a loaf of bread,
    but another man’s wife preys on your very life
  Can a man scoop fire into his lap
    without his clothes being burned?
Can a man walk on hot coals
    without his feet being scorched? -Proverbs 6: 25-28

 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. --Matthew 5:27-28

   Jesus is very clear. Looking at a woman lustfully is adultery. Pornography is adultery. That is clear. So you cannot keep living as if you are unaware of the severity of the sin you are in. But we serve a forgiving and loving God. One who redeems, who cleanses, who grants mercy when we fail. I am going to post more about this glorious forgiveness soon. For now, parents, don't be afraid to talk to your teens about sex and pornography. Teens, if you are currently struggling with pornography, it is not enough to just resolve to stop. You have to make a plan of action. XXXchurch is a great resource for more information on how to set up Internet filters, it has articles to read, information on how to end your addiction and how to talk to your parents about it. You know I'm always here for you too. The reward is great. It will just take some time to get there.

No comments:

Post a Comment